I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
Humor drinking humor
I like children. If they're properly cooked.
Fell in love with a beautiful blonde once. Drove me to drink. And I never had the decency to thank her.
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore, always carry a small snake.
We survived for days on nothing but food and water.
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
Don't be a luddy-duddy! Don't be a mooncalf! Don't be a jabbernowl! You're not those, are you?